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Holy Cow: A Modern-Day Dairy Tale

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Re: Holy Cow: A Modern-Day Dairy Tale

Post by jade1013 on Wed 6 Apr - 13:50



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Re: Holy Cow: A Modern-Day Dairy Tale

Post by sir on Wed 6 Apr - 14:05

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Re: Holy Cow: A Modern-Day Dairy Tale

Post by jade1013 on Thu 14 Apr - 8:50



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Re: Holy Cow: A Modern-Day Dairy Tale

Post by sir on Thu 14 Apr - 8:51

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Re: Holy Cow: A Modern-Day Dairy Tale

Post by jade1013 on Tue 19 Apr - 15:31

Holy Cow! David Duchovny’s Barnyard Book (Ft. a Pig Named “Shalom”) is a Surprising Pleasure.

April 19, 2016

A few years back, I glibly made light of the fact that actor David Duchovny had put pen to paper, and was in the process of publishing a book entitled “Holy Cow,” about, among other things, a semitic swine named “Shalom” (I know, I know) who—through a series of misadventures—ends up bringing peace to the Middle East as he globe-trots with his fellow barnyard brethren, a turkey named Tom and the story’s titular bovine, and enlightened guernsey named Elsie. .

At the time, and with tongue planted firmly in cheek, I wrote Duchovny’s book “isn’t simply going to be good, it’s going to be great. Hell, more than great,” and described it as “a watershed moment” for literature.

I know, I know. Dick thing to say.

When “Holy Cow” finally came out in early 2015, I didn’t read it because, well, who has the time? And when the paperback edition was released in September of that same year, well, I didn’t read it then either.

But, as it happens, I found myself between reads this weekend, and happened to see “Holy Cow” at the bookstore. I figured why not? “You’d already critiqued it, sight unseen,” I reasoned to myself. “How about you actually give the damn thing a try.” Plus, at a svelte 200 pages, it’s not exactly like I was committing myself to Caro’s megalithic “Power Broker.”

Well, as it turns out, the joke I’d started to tell back in 2014 when I’d balked at the mere notion of Duchovny (who, as it turns out, has an M.A. in English Lit from Yale, and they don’t give those out to just anybody, you know) is squarely on me. Not only was “Holy Cow” not the excruciatingly obtuse celebrity vanity project I’d perhaps been expecting—it was actually a blast. A genuinely fun read, with maybe something important to say, thrown in for good measure.

The story of Elsie, a cow who accidentally stumbles onto the fact that she is, in fact, nothing more than a meal waiting to happen for her human owners. Along with Shalom the pig (nee Jerry) who has converted to Judaism in an attempt to save his skin by way of kashrut, and Tom the Turkey, who starves himself for fear of looking too appealing come Thanksgiving, Elsie stages a barnyard breakout and the three set off for India (where cows are worshipped), Israel (where pigs are left uneaten) and Turkey (where Tom assume’s he’ll be greeted like a king).

Along the way, Duchovny packs the story with plenty of animalistic wordplay, as well as subtle (and occasionally not-so-subtle) observations about human nature, religion, environmentalism, and politics. Which isn’t to say that the book packs the philosophical punch of, say, “Animal Farm.”

But that, clearly, isn’t the point of “Holy Cow.” Where Orwell’s story is heavy handed and imposing, Duchovny spins a lighthearted fable in which readers are simply taken along for a breezy ride, while his bovine narrator makes some decent—if fairly obvious, and simplistic—points about how we live our lives, and how we could live them a little better if we weren’t so caught up in thinking our species was something special.

My point is this: “Holy Cow” is, it turns out, a lot of fun. It’s worth a read. You’ll probably like it. You’ll probably laugh. I did.

I just wish it hadn’t taken me two years to figure that out for myself.

*****
“Holy Cow” is out now.


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Re: Holy Cow: A Modern-Day Dairy Tale

Post by sir on Tue 19 Apr - 15:35

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Re: Holy Cow: A Modern-Day Dairy Tale

Post by sir on Wed 20 Apr - 7:34




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Re: Holy Cow: A Modern-Day Dairy Tale

Post by jade1013 on Wed 20 Apr - 7:35


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Re: Holy Cow: A Modern-Day Dairy Tale

Post by Duchovny on Wed 20 Apr - 10:25

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Re: Holy Cow: A Modern-Day Dairy Tale

Post by sir on Fri 22 Apr - 8:07

When is a cow not a cow, and a story not (much of) a story?–David Duchovny’s “Holy Cow!”

Maybe it’s just that it’s spring, all things are budding and blooming, and once again I’ve begun my hunt for the perfectly (or even imperfectly) uplifting book, possibly one with a message, or just one with a lot of fun to it.    I had wondered if David Duchovny’s book Holy Cow! would be it.  It wasn’t.  Perceive me as seriously underwhelmed, both in the uplifting-message and the amusement department.:

Since there’s not much point in worrying about spoilers and such when a book has no suspense anyway (especially not of the literary kind), here’s what the book is basically “about”:

A cow named Elsie, a pig first named Jerry who then re-names himself “Shalom,” and a turkey named Tom, all of whom suddenly acquire the ability to read and operate technology, decide to leave the farm and go (respectively) to India, Israel, and Turkey, where they expect to elude their seeming fates as human food and be appreciated (or worshipped, in Elsie’s case) as the individuals they are.  Fair enough.  But the book’s jokes are hokey and fall flat, the twists and turns of the “plot” are unsurprising or at least unrewarding, and the “message” at the end, that we should all (humans as well as animals) appreciate that we are animals and work a better deal out between our higher and lower faculties, is not handled well, and comes out facile and silly.  The whole is clearly not an allegory, and even mentions George Orwell’s famous book Animal Farm, which is.  The later book mentions that an ordinary farm is not like Orwell’s allegorical one, which seems to initiate a departure point for Duchovny’s story, yet the point seems to be obvious:  this is a story with talking animals which is not an allegory.  So what?  It doesn’t make it as a fairy tale either, and is not one which I can imagine children taking an interest in (or adults finding enough satisfaction in to keep then reading, unless they had committed to do a post on the book, like yours truly).

The three animals travel together (and the improbabilities of this roving life are not overcome by any startling or marvelous events such as we are used to in fantasy fiction), and in each of the three target countries, they are disappointed of their goals to be individuals.  Their learning curves are very unstupendous, as they don’t change much in the choices they anticipate for themselves, Elsie (for example) returning to the farm, to the ordinary cow’s life, quite possibly.

So, what do I advise about this book?  Give it a miss, unless you are just a sort of person who’s curious about what celebrities think about in their spare time.  The “I-wrote-this-book” element comes in strongly at the end, when Duchovny presents himself as the “cow-writer” (by unamusing analogy with “ghost-writer”?).  Though I rarely pan a book wholeheartedly, this is one that I really do dislike, not for any big overwhelming thing it does wrong, but just because it’s boring and the choices are ones that are expected and dull.  But then, I guess that is a big overwhelming thing!  The author is listed in the credits as an actor, director, and writer.  I suppose it’s cranky to say he should stick to acting, where others provide him with words, and where a lot of us like him.  I’ve never seen anything he’s directed, and so can’t comment about that.  But if this a representation of his abilities as a writer, then he needs a writing class which focuses on topic (I didn’t really notice much wrong with his stylistics or grammar, but perhaps that’s because I was slogging through the book looking for content).  And now, I think I’ll take a dose of spring tonic to get over my bitchy mood, and look for a better book to read and review.

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Re: Holy Cow: A Modern-Day Dairy Tale

Post by jade1013 on Fri 22 Apr - 8:31


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Re: Holy Cow: A Modern-Day Dairy Tale

Post by jade1013 on Tue 26 Apr - 9:07

Your daily spiel for Tuesday, April 26

By Daniel Koren, Online Editor - April 26, 2016



Your Daily Spiel is The CJN‘s daily roundup of trending stories in the Jewish world.

David Duchovny wrote a book starring a pig named Shalom. No this is not a joke. Holy Cow, an animated book by the X-Files actor, follows the story of a cow, a pig (who converts to Judaism) and a turkey that realize they’ll be tomorrow’s leftovers if they stay on a farm. So, to avoid sure death, they take off for India (where cows are sacred), Israel (where pigs aren’t eaten), and…..well….Turkey. This actually looks like an awesome read.


Canadian Jewish News

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Re: Holy Cow: A Modern-Day Dairy Tale

Post by sir on Tue 26 Apr - 9:09

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Re: Holy Cow: A Modern-Day Dairy Tale

Post by sir on Thu 26 May - 3:22




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Re: Holy Cow: A Modern-Day Dairy Tale

Post by jade1013 on Thu 26 May - 4:19


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Re: Holy Cow: A Modern-Day Dairy Tale

Post by sir on Thu 26 May - 8:44




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Re: Holy Cow: A Modern-Day Dairy Tale

Post by jade1013 on Thu 26 May - 9:24


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Re: Holy Cow: A Modern-Day Dairy Tale

Post by sir on Tue 31 May - 4:23

Review: David Duchovny – Holy Cow






Why have I given this book five stars? Well, allow me to explain. This little lovely book has everything I want from a story. For the setting of it, it has just the right length, it’s very funny, it’s easy to read but it’s also philosophical and story hiding inside this perhaps little bizarre and crazy story is actually very deep life philosophy that is worth repeating.


Holy Cow is, you guessed it, story about a cow named Elsie who finds out the awful thing mankind does to animals, especially farm animals, as anyone would be, she is frightened and rightfully looking for way out. Now, cows are not the only endangered species, so naturally she is joined by turkey (it is America based story) and pig.

Together they find themselves, their new abilities but also their new future. Anyway. I think it is safe to say, that David Duchovny has the ability to become the perfect cow, if you don’t mind me saying that.

Do not let annotations by book-stores and pages deceit you. This is a very clever, funny even a hip story and you should read this. Oh I should mention, cows see this world differently and therefore they care very little of the idiocy and ignorants situation we have created. Just warning. Just, so you know. Whispers: “Religion”.



This ^ is David Duchovny, by the way owner of a master digree from literature. And that is something you can clearly feel in his book, not the endless hour in styding, although that too, but the respect and love for it.

You will probably know this artist as an actor, for that is his most known profession, you know, from such roles as in The X-Files, Californication, Playing God or Red Shoe Diaries.

But Mr.Duchovny is also skilled in music, having released fairly impressive album Hell or Highwater. His skills are also being amazing cow-writer.

Retrovold.wordpress

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Re: Holy Cow: A Modern-Day Dairy Tale

Post by jade1013 on Tue 31 May - 4:40


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Re: Holy Cow: A Modern-Day Dairy Tale

Post by sir on Mon 13 Jun - 15:00

Holy Cow: A Novel

On: June 13, 2016 By: lowpricebooks
Holy Cow: A Novel by David Duchovny



A rollicking, globe-trotting adventure with a twist: a four-legged heroine you won’t soon forget

Elsie Bovary is a cow, and a pretty happy one at that–her long, lazy days are spent eating, napping, and chatting with her best friend, Mallory. One night, Elsie and Mallory sneak out of their pasture; but while Mallory is interested in flirting with the neighboring bulls, Elsie finds herself drawn to the farmhouse. Through the window, she sees the farmer’s family gathered around a bright Box God–and what the Box God reveals about something called an “industrial meat farm” shakes Elsie’s understanding of her world to its core.

There’s only one solution: escape to a better, safer world. And so a motley crew is formed: Elsie; Jerry–excuse me, Shalom–a cranky, Torah-reading pig who’s recently converted to Judaism; and Tom, a suave (in his own mind, at least) turkey who can’t fly, but who can work an iPhone with his beak. Toting stolen passports and slapdash human disguises, they head for the airport.

Elsie is our wisecracking, pop-culture-reference-dropping, slyly witty narrator; Tom–who does eventually learn to fly (sort of)–dispenses psychiatric advice in a fake German accent; and Shalom, rejected by his adopted people in Jerusalem, ends up unexpectedly uniting Israelis and Palestinians. In Holy Cow, David Duchovny’s charismatic creatures point the way toward a mutual understanding and acceptance that the world desperately needs.

Lowpricebooks.co

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Re: Holy Cow: A Modern-Day Dairy Tale

Post by jade1013 on Mon 13 Jun - 18:04


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Re: Holy Cow: A Modern-Day Dairy Tale

Post by Duchovny on Wed 15 Jun - 1:24

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Re: Holy Cow: A Modern-Day Dairy Tale

Post by sir on Sun 26 Jun - 10:14

a cow, a pig, and a turkey board an international flight – a review of David Duchovny’s Holy Cow





JUNE 24, 2016
If that sounds like the opening of a joke, that’s because it is! David Duchovny’s first novel, Holy Cow, is a fun, silly romp. I laughed aloud more than once, but not continuously.

In short, a farm cow looks into the family room of the farmer’s home and sees a TV program showing her bloody fate. But she also sees that there’s a land where cows are revered: India. She seeks to get there, along with a pig who wants to go to Israel and a turkey who wants to get to Turkey. As you can imagine, mayhem ensues.

Who is this book aimed at? No idea. If it were a movie, it would be a PG-13 for language, and despite the anthropomorphized animals, most of the humor is over the heads of smaller children. But I enjoyed it.
A few tidbits:

On global warming: “Stop blaming me and my gas for global warming. I can’t drive a car.”

On selfies: “Selfies they call ’em, and that makes sense ’cause even though they’re sending these pictures to others, it still smells like selfish to me. Is that why they call it an ‘I phone’?”

On TV: “I realized that the Box God is not just one god, but many gods in one box. … It seemed that everyone in the family wanted to worship different gods. The youngest girl wanted to worship the Nickelodeon God, the dad wanted to worship the ESPN God…while the mom was happy with this Discovery God. Mom won out. Everybody else…left the room grumbling, and I realized that all humans must have a Box God in their own rooms. … What a strange god that instead of bringing people together, divides them.”

On plane behavior: “None of the flight attendants gave us any trouble, ’cause everyone acts like an animal on a plane.”

It was light and entertaining and occasionally a little bit thoughtful.

POSITIVE

Kirkus – “a charming fable about dignity and tolerance, complete with anthropomorphized animals and replete with puns, double-entendres, and sophisticated humor” https://www.kirkusreviews.com/book-reviews/david-duchovny/holy-cow-duchovny/

Denver Post – “a seriously entertaining fable that doesn’t take itself too seriously.” http://www.denverpost.com/2015/02/12/book-review-holy-cow-by-david-duchovny/

The Guardian – “although Elsie’s “memoir” feels slight, and reads too often like a funny first draft of something more substantial, it does what all good animal novels do – it makes us think about our relationship with the other species we share the planet with.” https://www.theguardian.com/books/2015/feb/04/holy-cow-david-duchovny-review

MIXED

HuffPost – “the book seems to have no real idea who its audience is or what it’s actually about…The sheer absurdity of this roller coaster of a book makes for some knee-slapping moments, however.” http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/6598702.html


NEGATIVE

“Holy Cow is one of the most half-baked, phoned-in books I’ve ever read, and it’s hard to look at it as anything but a vanity project.”  http://www.npr.org/2015/02/07/383875612/dont-have-a-cow-man

Tukopamoja

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Re: Holy Cow: A Modern-Day Dairy Tale

Post by jade1013 on Sun 26 Jun - 10:20


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Re: Holy Cow: A Modern-Day Dairy Tale

Post by Duchovny on Mon 27 Jun - 8:16

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Re: Holy Cow: A Modern-Day Dairy Tale

Post by sir on Thu 30 Jun - 10:19




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Re: Holy Cow: A Modern-Day Dairy Tale

Post by jade1013 on Thu 30 Jun - 10:20


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